20 Lessons in Years

A Little Adrift … 20 Lessons from 5 Years Traveling Around the World

Five years ago today, I sat at Los Angeles International Airport watching the ground crew load the plane outside the window with baggage and fuel. Conflicting emotions warred inside of me; in two short hours I would board a one-way flight to Australia to start my year-long round the world trip. This moment was the culmination of five months of meticulous planning and the realization of my dream to see other places—to find a purpose for myself while traveling through the cultures and countries I had read about in National Geographic all my life. My brief but powerful panic attack earlier in the day gave way to acceptance as I sat at my gate… I was nervous and still unsure about what awaited a slender, solo 24-year-old woman from the states who possessed little travel experience but great curiosity, but I had faith that even if everything went wrong and I hated this decision, that I would come out okay on the other side.

I didn’t know it then, but that solo trip evolved into five years of slowly traveling and working my way around the world. I have spent long periods of time exploring just a few regions of the world, and beyond that, I used these years to gain a better perspective on myself. Some lessons over the years were hard-won and humbling, others came from unlikely tutors and at unlikely times. Here are 22 things I’ve learned since that day I sat at the LA airport debating the wisdom of my decision to travel solo around the world.

1. The world is inherently kind.

I say this often here on A Little Adrift and in personal conversations. When I meet new people and they hear my story, many are alarmed by some of the countries I have visited. They only hear negative stories and stereotypes perpetuated by the mainstream media. And so, this mantra bears repeating: traveling illustrates the inherent kindness in the world. Yes there are dangers out there, and I have discussed some of them before, but the friends I met these past five years have welcomed me into their homes, helped me when I was sick, and generously offered their time to share a piece of their culture with me.

2. Language barriers are easier than most people imagine.

Many reader emails express fear over the language barrier in a new place. It’s also a frequent question middle schoolers ask me when I speak in their classroom (right up there with “what’s the grossest thing you’ve even eaten?). With the hundreds of languages and  dialects out there in the world it’s easy to get bogged down in the perceived obstacle. The truth is, though, English is the language of tourism in most places. There are places it’s still rare, but major tourist sites generally default to English as the second language of communication. And when it is not, you can get through with a smile, patience, a game of charades, and a language app on your smartphone (or a phrasebook if you’re old-school).

3. Solo does not mean lonely.

It can mean lonely at times, I have never been lonelier than when I was sick on the road, but those moments are the exception, not the rule. The very fact that I have traveled mostly solo these past five years has opened up conversations, moments of clarity, and deep friendships that would have been harder to find if I traveled with others. Because I’m out there alone on the road, I seek friendships and bonds that group travelers may not need or notice. And as a single woman, I am accepted into places males are not allowed. Women befriend me on buses, they invite me to tea, and in many cultures men and women alike take me under their wing the moment they find out I am alone, offering help, friendship, and safety. And sometimes, the solitude and mental space to work through thoughts on your own is reason enough to travel solo. Solo travel teaches more about your self than any self-help book ever could and every person should travel alone at least once in their life.

4. Travel is affordable.

Traveling the world for five years on end is out of the norm for most people, and many friends tell me they would never switch places with me because they can’t imagine that many long stretches away from a home-base. But almost every person I meet expresses a wish to travel somewhere, even if on a short vacation. And it’s possible. Travel does not have to be a high-end luxury cruise around Europe, it can be, but for those who dream of travel, it’s more affordable than you imagine. My 11-months on that first year cost me about $18,000 for everything from lodging to airfare to food. Many developing countries offer experiences for a fraction of the cost of traveling in the US or Europe, and afford a chance to also see disparate cultures you won’t find close to home either. The countless other travelers I have met on the road come from every income bracket and socio-economic level. If you prioritize travel, you can find the ways to make it happen.

5. Travel, like life, is personal.

The longer I travel the more I realize that what one traveler loves, another might find dreadful. I eschew big cities and am content to travel through in towns with sub-500 people… that just sounds like hell to some. Museums are not my thing but I can wax poetic on my hike or the linguistic nuances of a new language I’m learning. We all geek-out on different things, and it’s totally fine to geek-out on whatever makes you happy.

6. Gratitude is the greatest lesson in cultivating a happy life.

Traveling with my niece underscored for me the importance of instilling the character traits of empathy and gratitude into the next generation. With Ana, we talked about the wealth disparities we saw and the places we visited. Seeing how hard parents in Laos had to work to send their child to the most basic schooling gave her a tangible appreciation for her educational opportunities. She saw the long, long hours farmers put in to grow the rice and coffee that fill our tables in the West, hours spent making a living wage that barely supports their most basic needs. Practicing gratitude is not exclusive to travel, but long-term travel cultivates lessons in thankfulness and instills the practice deep into your life.

7. Eat the street food.

Sampling the local street eats in a new place is actually cautioned against in some guidebooks. For shame. While there are definitely precautions you have to take eat safely in some places, the flavors, freshness, conversations, and friendships formed on tiny plastic stools sitting at rickety tables behind steamy hot street food stalls are many of my greatest memories. It’s worth it.

8. Always carry travel medicine.

It can save your life… especially if you eat the street food. ;-)

9. Lessons come from unlikely places and unlikely people.

I have spent hundreds of hours in deep conversations with strangers on buses, trains, and planes all over the world. Each new person offered a fascinating story, a nugget of wisdom, or a nuance of the local culture. Through these conversations I learned a great respect for how different our lives can be, but even more the shared commonalities. Travel made me face my arrogant notions of book smarts and instead look at each new conversation and experience as a chance to learn something new.

10. The developing world is more modern than you think.

Though I have seen great poverty and wealth disparities on my travels, it is the modernity of foreign places that surprised me most when I left to travel. Bangkok, Thailand has some of the most spectacular glass malls in the world—a dozen floors of haute couture, trendy restaurants, and enormous cinemas. Cellphones are ubiquitous the world over, a fact surprising to many.

11. Make new friends, but keep the old ones.

I had a music box in childhood that tinkled the notes from a song into the air when it opened, the lyrics went “make new friends/ but keep the old/ one is silver and the other gold.” These past five years have taught me important lessons about nurturing and maintaining my old friendships even in the face of new ones. Through this website I have formed deep connections within the travel community, and people I have lifelong friendships with some of the people I met on the road. I value these people and the role they play in my life, but equally important are the friends I know who know my history. It hasn’t always been easy to balance traveling long-term with supporting those friends, but as the years pass and I return home for visits I am increasingly grateful for those old friends who accept and support my decision to live on the road.

12. Accept kindness.

Somebody wise probably once said that cynicism is the great killer of joy. If not, they should have. Accept kindnesses from strangers and be open to invitations and new experiences. Accept the chai tea offered by the friendly shop owner and learn his story. Jump the offer to go to a large Indian wedding in the next town, you’ll have a blast. Be gracious, bring a gift, and be open to the new experience.

13. Call your parents.

My dad has never made me feel guilty for staying on the road these past five years, and as a thanks for his support I make sure to assuage his fears and whatever way I can, because though I am not a parent, I know my the weeks I drop off the grid without any contact are hard on him. So, whenever Internet allows I send frequent e-mails, we Skype a couple of times a month, and I generally respect that this person invested 18 years of his life making sure I lived to adulthood, the least I can do is keep him in the loop.

14. It’s okay to buy souvenirs.

I buy myself paintings from all over the world and ship them home. This flies in the face of the traveling minimalists who huff at the notion of souvenirs and “stuff.” I think it’s a question of acquiring the right stuff. My paintings are all in storage right now, and I don’t know when or where I may eventually settle, but they are my treasured possession. I also ship home thoughtful gifts to the people in my life who matter. My dad receives coffee from all over the world, we bond over this and it has made him feel a part of it (see number 13). One friend loves collecting jewelry from new places, another is a fan of scarves. My mother loves nothing more than those super touristy t-shirts, you know, the ones with an embroidered Eiffel Tower and the name “Paris” in cursive just below it; I send these to her from every new place. Their little tokens, and some people don’t get it, but to me, these things matter.

15. Take your mom’s advice: Count to 10 when you’re frustrated.

Traveling in developing regions of the world could try the patience of a saint. There’s the constant bargaining. The swarm of people who surround you when you leave a train stations. The touts and tuk-tuks vying for your attention. There are moments when you desperately need space and you feel like everyone’s ripping you off… this is when you need to count to 10, take a deep breath, and allow yourself a little head space to take stock of the situation. Find a bench, find a bathroom, find some way to back off from the overwhelm and find some perspective.

16. Spend money when it’s warranted.

While there are times to be frugal and keep to a budget, a once-in-a-lifetime trip should be memorable. Always convert local currencies back into the US dollar before you nix a trip or experience. It’s easy to freak out over that 120,000 kip day trip in Laos, but it’s really only $15 USD and that’s not quite so alarming a figure, is it? This is also true when it means splurging on a central guesthouse, or taking the taxi home if it’s safer or if it’ll make your life a bit easier. As with everything, keep perspective.

17. Never leave your luggage unattended.

If you’ve ever traveled through an airport you hear this message repeated from the speakers every 15 minutes. And it isn’t just wise when you’re about to face the TSA, it’s also sage travel advice. In many places, taking your hand off your purse may be the last thing you do with that purse. Be conscious of your belongings when you’re in public, and spread your valuables among your bags (mom’s wisdom strikes again, don’t keep all your eggs in one basket). Maintaining that consciousness of your possessions is one of those “hard-learned” lessons every travelers learns along the way.

18. Pack light, you really can it buy it there.

When I sat in that airport terminal five years ago, I had completely over-packed; I ended up ditching heaps of the things I thought I needed, and lugging around a years-worth of some things that were easily replaceable. You really can find: tampons, shampoo, new clothes, safety pins, and all the other myriad things you think you might not exist outside the US. The one thing you can’t find? Solid deodorant. I don’t like roll-on deodorant, and it’s very hard to find solid deodorant in many places, so I bring enough to last me through my trip. For all things non-deodorant related though, you can likely find it there.

19. Great things lie on the other side of fear.

The idea of traveling solo terrified me when I first left. Over the years though, it’s at the very moment that I am most afraid to move forward with an idea, when fears paralyze me, that I know I need to push through. I don’t mean fears like a physical danger, but rather the fears that box us in and prevent us from reaching our goals. Travel taught me that when you feel resistance, it’s that very thing that you will like find most rewarding on the other side.

20. Smile often. :-)

Smiling is a gift that transcends cultures. It is the universal communicator. Though I you should learn the basic “thank you’s” and “hellos” in the local language, smiling can replace either of these gestures, and it should always accompany them. Not only can you express gratitude with a smile, but a simple smile has been the start of many amazing conversations over the years. That little gesture opened the door to offers of kindness because it made me more approachable to foreigners and locals alike. Really, you can’t go wrong if you approach your travels with smiles, patience, and gratitude.

***

It’s been a wild ride these past five years, and I had no idea I would find a way to continue working from the road and traveling this great big planet. As always, thanks for your support along the journey, shoot me an email if I can ever help you, and safe travels where ever you next find yourself!

~Shannon

copyrights belongs to http://alittleadrift.com